Archive for October, 2011

Crazy Cravings

October 28, 2011

Loving food as much as I do, I’ve always been intrigued with what pregnant women crave during those nine months they are baking that bun in the oven. As of yesterday I am at week 23, so I thought it would be fun to go back through some of the crazy cravings I’ve had up to this point.

Before I even knew I was pregnant, I was craving one of my husband’s favorite meals as a child – grape koolaid and a chutney sandwich! We still laugh at that today, our little man was paying tribute to his Dad from day one! Having heart disease, I follow a low sodium diet. And with this pregnancy, it has been more important than ever that I stick to an even stricter sodium diet. Interesting enough, by following this diet, I really have kept a lot of my swelling off. So note to other pregnant women, if you are having issues with swelling – cut your sodium!!!!!

Not long after finding out I was pregnant, the morning sickness hit. About all I could eat was watermelon and saltine crackers, and the occasional bowl of chicken noodle soup. From there we moved on to Grape Ice. Now, if you have never had grape ice before, you are missing one of life’s greatest treats. As a kid, my cousin and I would go shopping with our moms the day after Thanksgiving. We were too young to really shop, so they would give us a couple of dollars that eagerly got spent at the Baskin Robbins. And our poison, was a grape ice and sprite float. This became a tradition. If my craving is any indication then this will also become a tradition with my son. Unfortunately Baskin Robbins no longer makes this ice cream. However, Brewsters does!!! I don’t think I can count the gallons I have gone though. This isn’t an ice cream they keep in stock all the time, but for a crazy craving pregnant woman, the Brewsters by my house is making an exception!

Water is the primary liquid that I drink, as it should be anyones’. Having said that, it still hasn’t stopped me from having a few liquid cravings – sweet tea, raspberry ginger ale and root beer. Like the grape ice, if you have not tried the raspberry ginger ale then you truly are missing out on something special in this life. For those of us not into the drug scene, raspberry ginger ale is my liquid crack. It’s that good and that addictive. And it’s caffeine free!!

Once my appetite came back we (I say we because my husband has made it his mission to make sure any foods I crave I have access to) have gone through a multitude of cravings. If I had to name the biggest one, it would be pasta. Pasta anything, pasta anyhow, pasta anywhere! I can not get enough pasta! Or chicken for that matter…. I think I may turn into a chicken if I keep eating it. Chicken sandwich, grilled chicken salad, chicken breasts, fried chicken – if it has chicken then watchout!

There have been a few phase-cravings: Peanut butter and candy. And then there are the cravings for foods I can’t have right now. I would give anything for an STP from Groucho’s Deli with extra special sauce. Or a good ‘ole club sandwich. A rare steak would be absolutely fantastic right about now. I do have one confession to make….. technically I’m not supposed to eat hotdogs, but I have been craving chili dogs from the Varsity. So…. I had to indulge once, with an orange frosty to wash it down.

By normal pregnant women’s standards, I am a little past the half way point. My heart won’t allow me to carry this pregnancy to term. It will be interesting to see not only how long I am able to carry this pregnancy, but also how my cravings will change for the second half! So stay tuned!!

What You Can Learn From Your Dog

October 26, 2011

With getting married this year I have acquired two new playmates – Mookie and Smitty. They are both rather large size labs. Now most people would think they just belong in the backyard where they can run and play and work off all that crazy lab energy they have. But since becoming pregnant, these guys have become my two newest best friends. In fact, I’m pretty sure these guys sensed something was up far before I ever did. The book/movie Marley & Me was about the crazy life of their lab and all the hysterical messes he got into. But at the end of the book was this beautiful story about the incredible relationship with man’s best friend. While I don’t have any wacky stories of hilarious mishaps my dogs have gotten into, I do have two four-legged friends that have given me story after story of love, hope and support.

Since I’m on pretty much bed rest, my two new best friends spend all day with me. Now don’t get me wrong, they get their time to run and play outside. But for the most part, I have one flanked on either side of me at all times. They can tell when I’m upset (even if it’s just pregnancy hormones getting emotional at a Kleenex commercial) and are immediately in my face giving me kisses, or have their heads laying sweetly in my lap to remind me they still love me. When I have a seizure they are alert by my side in case there is anything I need (now if I can just train them to pour me a glass of water and grab my medicine…). When Baby G decides it is nap time for us, then it’s nap time for the dogs. They more than love to snooze with mamma. They don’t go to bed at night until I’m ready, so on those insomniac filled nights I have two best friends to watch Golden Girls with!! And as crazy as this one sounds, these guys will sit there with the most attentive ears and listen to me talk, cry, complain, vent, laugh – anything I need to get off my chest. Regardless of if I want it or not, they will give me their opinion on such matters. Even when I cook, I have two little sous chefs just waiting for me to drop something on the floor.

These guys never leave my side. With everyday, normal life you have good days and bad days. But with pregnancy, those days get magnified beyond imagination. It doesn’t matter if I am at my ugliest, my two guys are always happy to see me and be around me. And when I don’t love myself, they constantly remind me of how much they love me. I could be completely in the wrong, and they will take my side teaching me more about loyalty than just about anything else in this life has. These guys could be completely wiped out and ready to call it a night, but if I’m having a seizure or just can’t sleep, they will stay awake by my side until I finally fall asleep. When I move, they move.

Love, loyalty, support, hope, friendship. These guys depend on me for food, water and shelter. There is so much more I seem to depend on them for.┬áJust as good as these guys have been to me, I know they will be this tenfold to my son. Who would have thought that in the time I need a friend most in my life, it’s my two dogs who have really stepped up to the plate.

Looking for a Lifeline

October 25, 2011

I’m starting to wonder if I am ever going to get a good night’s sleep. Not from the uncomfortableness of being pregnant, but from nightmares. I used to love waking up and being able to remember my dreams. Now that love only serves to haunt me throughout the day…..

One might say that part of my nightmares comes from the spiritual battle that is going on in my life. I would like to add all the unnecessary drama to that equation. From people wanting to hash out arguments from well over a year ago, to a person who seems it is their mission to ruin and rip apart my marriage to people just saying out right ugly things to a pregnant person – it’s no wonder I stay stressed out most of the time and can’t seem to get any rest.

Add on top of that the endless medical bills that are stacking up from me having a high risk pregnancy and not able to work right now. 90% of MS patients go into remission during pregnancy, and guess what – I’m a part of the fun-filled 10% that gets to fight this hateful disease while trying to keep my baby safe. Realistically, I have no idea if my heart is going to medically make it through this pregnancy and have to live with the fear everyday that I may not be here to take care of my son. My seizures have come back full force.

The doctors have said over and over again that I need to rest, to sleep, to relax. I don’t need stress in my life. The medical and financial stress is all on me, but for the rest – why can’t people just give me a break until this baby is born? Why do they feel that proving they are right is more important than my health and my baby’s health?

“Is there anybody out there?
Can you pull me from this ocean of despair?
I’m drowning in the pain, breaking down again
Looking for a lifeline”
– Lifeline, Papa Roach

I know where my life line is – God. Ironically, in one of my devotionals the other day it said, “You have no idea of where God is going to engineer your circumstances, no knowledge of what strain is going to be put on you either at home or abroad, and if you waste your time in over-active energies instead of getting into soak on the great fundamental truths of God’s Redemption, you will snap when the strain comes, but if this time of soaking before God is being spent in getting rooted and grounded in God on the unpractical line, you will remain true to Him whatever happens.”

God, I’m looking for a life line right now. A life line of peace and rest to get through this pregnancy. A break. And maybe even one restful night’s sleep.